When I talk to people about self care, what I frequently hear are issues with time, with quality of the self care, with understanding what self care can look like, etc.
What I don’t hear as often is why self care is important to them.
Here’s the non-secret-secret. If you want anything to last, in particular self care, you have to know WHY it matters to you.
And if you’re going to make self care last, if you’re going to make it a lifetime habit, then quite frankly you need to give one serious damn about yourself. Because the word “self” is critical to self care.
When I ask people why self care is important to them, most people will talk about productivity at work, being able to show up better for their families, having more energy to do x, y and z. That’s fine. But those are external motivators. That’s doing things for OTHER people.
I’m not saying showing up for others is a bad thing, but if we’re talking about putting YOURSELF first, then YOU, your needs, your desires, your health for YOUR sake, needs to be at the centre of your why.
You know the L’Oreal tagline? Because you’re worth it!
We are so external-focused as a society right now. It’s funny, because I hear all this junk about how millennials are self-absorbed, about how we only care about ourselves, la-di-da, but what I see is mass insecurity. I see that we need to look outside for validation. That’s not self-love. That’s not where self-care is rooted. That’s external strokes.
If you want LASTING self-care, you have to give a damn about yourself. You have to know why you’re worth it.
It’s a short episode today, but it’s important. I want you to grab a piece of paper. Yes, physical paper, because there truly is power putting pen to paper.
I want you to answer this question with as many thoughts as possible.
The reasons that I am important enough to invest in self care are…
You tell me. ANYTHING that comes to your mind, write it down.
If you’re doing this live, pause, write things down, then press play when you’re done and we’ll continue.
What did you come up with? Reflect on that. If you’re struggling with this exercise, here are some of the reasons that I came up with.
The reasons that I am important enough to invest in self care are:
- because I’m awesome!
- because I love feeling strong
- because I create and I need energy to create incredible things
- because I have a lot of love to give, but I have to love and care for myself first
- because I deserve the care and attention that I give to others
- because I am worthy. Period. End of.
Your list can look totally different to this, or it can look the same, but I guarantee that if your why for self-care, for personal growth, for personal development, if that why doesn’t include YOU for YOUR sake, then it won’t last.
So get real clear on why you matter.
Once you figure that out, you just need the stepping stones to move forward. You need a path, and that’s where I come in.
Because I care so much that YOU care about yourself, I’ve developed a 6 week Summer of Self Care series. It’s online, and it runs June 3 to July 15 from 12-12:45 MST. This is a really cool small group coaching program where this group of 8 women will be your tribe for that period. You’ll cheer each other on, you’ll hold each other accountable, and I’m going to guide you through 6 weeks of material to help you create a self-care guide that works for you.
So if that sounds like what you need right now, then I encourage you to sign up! I want to be there for you and help you make yourself a priority. Once you hack self care, think of all the things that could open up in your life. If you put yourself first, what would change in your life? How would it be better? Now THAT is an exciting list.